Pussy Power (In memory of the best fluffy pussy ever) 💜

Hello!

I want to just take this moment to acknowledge you. And thank you, for your time, eyes, presence, and availability to be here reading these words.

Honestly, I love writing to you, for you, with you. It heals my soul. You heal my soul, every time you open an email from me, and smile, or write me back.

You made the decision to stay, and you keep doing so, and I just want you to know, that I love that you’re here.

💗😊

And now I want to talk to you about PUSSYPOWER...

Specifically, about my cat, who telepathically communicated to me that I should start my own business 3 years ago...

A little backstory...

Last weekend I moved to London, on my own, for a period.

I’ve taken on a research position at the UK’s number 1 ranked institution in academic research excellence you see (go me!) 😉, & Bob has gone up to Scotland as his mum has been diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease 😔...

It’s been a strange funk of newness, old fears coming up & lots of self-realisations.

We knew it was time to leave Bristol.

We were feeling stagnant in the place, and sometimes, I like to shake my life up to the max to get some fresh energy pulsing through it.

But it is never without tears and stress and anxiety. Yet, it is in these moments I really get to know myself.

I remember the wonders of my pussy and my soul shines out of her again...

Now, you may remember that back in May, my cat died.

His name was Frankie AKA Mr Fluff AKA The Fluffy Shaman AKA The KING.

We had been together for 2 years.

After I’d been in Bristol for about 4 months I had this deep calling to get a Fluffy friend. I wasn’t allowed to have pets in my flat so I decided that I would adopt an FIV positive (Feline HIV) cat (i.e. a house-bound cat).

Bob was totally against the whole cat idea.

But when a woman wants something, it’s gonna happen...

So I told him to brace himself, and...

The Sunday after we went to meet Him. Within 10 seconds of meeting him, Bob announced that he was coming home with us.

There was just something right about the whole situation, about him. Something magical and fluffy and... oh so calming!

Frankie had spent the past 2 years locked in a crazy cat woman’s kitchen who stole cat’s off the street and kept them locked up in her house.

The cat charity we got Frankie from were working with her to rehome many of the cats.

He had FIV, half a tail, was obese and a senior with no teeth!

But he was the sexiest damn cat I had ever met...

He just seemed to hover about the house in meditation, levitating from one room to another, bringing a monk like grace wherever he was. He scratched the door down until he got in the bedroom where he planted himself directly on my chest and proceeded to purr the deep kind of purrs that reverberate into your deep tissue cells with healing vibrations that heal your darkest wounds.

His two perfect white paws sat on my solar plexus and if I fell asleep before he, he would stretch out one of his perfect white paws and stick a single claw in my chin until I opened my eyes and resumed his head rub.

He never stood on my breasts (which my other cats do all the time) - he had so much respect for me as a woman!

He followed me everywhere and shared my morning porridge, he meowed for me at the door until I got home and let me take him outside wearing a cat harness and lead!

He was my best friend.

When he got really ill with mouth cancer (which I found out the morning of my photoshoot in LA after being up all night with the worst food poisoning of my life), I had so much regret and grief and sadness and shame that it was my fault.

I worried that I had neglected him when I started my business and our family grew.

For a period, it had been just me and him all the time while I worked for the University from home, and now the house was full of animals and I had to make my own money from scratch.

I remember he kept having difficulty peeing and I got annoyed at him.

I just wanted him to be well - I was stressed and busy and financially pressed.

I thought it was something he had had before that would pass.

Oh Lordy I cried so much about that.

I’m actually crying right now remembering that.

Leaving Bristol bought up a lot of the sadness and grief again surrounding his death.

I feel guilty leaving his little body buried there.

My pussy told me to get him cremated so I could bring him with me, but I didn’t listen to her. I thought it was 'too expensive’ at the time.

Trying to trust in the universe & the events that happened - sometimes it’s hard, sometimes I just want to tell it to go fuck itself.

I even considered digging him up last week, but Bob didn't think it would be a good idea... and deep down, I don’t think I really wanted to either!

'Let him rest in peace', he said.

'But what about me?' I wanted to know.

I guess this is life and it ain’t always roses. I’m just a human learning from my mistakes and hoping to make better decisions next time.

Trying to trust I made the right decisions at the time and forgive myself for not being perfect.

It’s funny how we strongly we focus on what we could have done better, rather than everything we did good and well - which, in my case with Frankie, was probably about 99% of the time.

I can’t imagine what it’s gonna be like having kids - big respect to all yo Mama’s out there...

Anyway, so back to the fun stuff, if you’re still with me - woohoo! I’ll make it worth your while...

After chilling with Mr Fluff on my solar plexus for about 5 months, I decided I wanted to build a website and start some sort of creative business venture.

So I wrote to Company’s House to set myself up with a Limited Company and made an appointment at Barclays Bank to set up a business bank account.

Shane was my account manager, and he thought I was hilarious.

My company was called 'The Fluffy Shaman’, after Mr Fluff of course (AKA The KING, AKA Frankie).

I’m pretty sure it was his business idea that he telepathically communicated to me and made me build with his Fluffy Powers.

That sentence is said kind of partly tongue in cheek, and kind of partly also true.

I don’t think I ever showed anyone TFS website before, expect Bob, which we (me & Mr Fluff) spent hours a day looking at cos we thought it was a fucking artistic masterpiece!

So here you go:

An ode to Mr Fluff & our Fluffy times together.

(If you are not a cat lover then 1) WTF are you doing here? (only joking! 😻), and 2) this may seem like a rather strange odd crazy cat lady email to you, and it is, but seriously, we definitely created that website together & he was undoubtedly a soul partner of mine who levitated and could transport himself through walls - one minute he’s on the bed sleeping, and next his furry tongue is in your cereal bowl on the table yet zero seconds have passed and you never saw him move - explain that one sane human?!)

Anyway, this is an email in memory of Mr Fluff and how much Fluffy Power he had and how much I loved him and how much he healed my life and my solar plexus and bought me so much joy and taught me so much about persistence and not giving a fuck and getting what you want and enjoying a good head rub every single day (several times an hour in fact).

Mr Fluff I love you and I still feel you getting your med on and your calming wise presence around me and on my solar plexus.

I miss your perfect white paws and your cute funny head.

Urban Feministas exists thanks to you and your Fluffy Powers, even though, The King, has, physically, left the building.

So my friend, if you haven’t got a cat, go get one this weekend. And if you do, love his or her purrs extra lots and give them lots of kisses and remember how magical they are.

Really, they have a lot in common with your pussy! 😉

Here’s to the healing powers of FLUFFY PUSSIES!

I love you Fluffty Fluff Fluff.

Your human Mama,

Keeley xxxxx 💋 🌝 🌱

 

P.S. I'd love to hear your magical cat stories (dead or alive!) & see their funny/ cute photos so please do share in the comments below or send me an email!

P.P.S. Fallen in love with Mr Fluff? Of course you have! Find out what happened to him in The Fluffy Adventures...