What's your love language?

Did you know that as humans we give and receive love in different ways?

When I first discovered this concept it was like epiphanies galore going off inside my brain...

I was going through one of the darkest periods in my life at the time, a relationship had ended that blasted apart my whole sense of identity and sent me spiraling into a dark night of the soul.

You know those moments don't you?

I know them well!

It's like that moment when Alice falls down the rabbit hole, and keeps falling, and falling, and falling, and wonders if she might fall through the center of the earth and come out the other side where people walk upside down. 

And then she drinks the out of the bottle which makes her so small, but she's forgotten the key, so she eats the sweet which makes her way too big and she doesn't know what to do so she cries and cries and cries and cries and cries. 

It was one of those stretches anyway (thankfully I don't really get them anymore - hooray!).

So I did what I do best - I studied! 

I read and listened to reams and reams of relationship books, trying to heal my family wounds and make myself a better communicator. 

I came across this one book by Gary Chapman which has always stayed with me called 'The 5 Love Languages', and as I move deep into my Tantric sex, love & relationship expert level training I think about it often. 

So today, I want to share them with you, in the hope that you glean a little joy discovering your secret love language, and have fun guessing those of family and friends. And also, that it might go a little way in bringing more harmonious relationships into your life, and to the wider world, and make it a better place for all involved!

So without further ado, let me introduce: 'The 5 Love Languages'...

#1) GIFTS
I'm putting this first because it is my favourite number one love language! Realising that this is my love language opened doors to ecstatic love for me! There was always this feeling that I was too 'materialistic', but guess what? I just fucking LOVE gifts! Wanna get me on your side forever and always?! Send me LOTSOFLOVELYPRESENTS! There's nothing quite like the feeling of being given a physical token and reminder of your love for me!
 

#2) ACTS OF SERVICE
If 'acts of service' is your love language, you like doing shit for people, and you love it when people do shit for you. This is absolutely my Dads number 1 love language - all my life I got annoyed at him for 1) giving me money and not GIFTS at present giving times, and 2) asking me to do shit for him when I didn't really want to - like making him a coffee or finding him the best phone deal! Oh, not now! How I revel in ordering him something off Amazon when he asks me to or taking Bob to fix his electrics. I love that he gives me money and not gifts because I know that is how he loves to love, and when I do those things he asks of him, he is really asking to be loved. 


#3) PHYSICAL TOUCH
I have a friend, who is probably reading this, so she will remain anonymous, but the first time we ever went on a night out together over 10 years ago now, we were in the middle of the crowd and I grabbed her hand (and probably her arse too) - it's what I did! After a few times of doing it, she politely told me that she didn't like me doing it, so would I stop. I didn't understand at the time that physical touch is one of my major love languages, and maybe not for her. If you're a touchy-feely type - this could be you!

#4) QUALITY TIME
Sometimes nothing can fill you up quite like an afternoon spent at a gallery with a friend, or enjoying lunch together, or lipstick shopping... You, me, us, life. Those moments you feel bonded and alive, unwasted, present, free to be who you are, feeling the connection of your soul to another beyond the realms of time and space. They can be simple moments like watching Sherlock on the sofa on a Sunday afternoon or that time you went on an epic adventure and climbed the tallest trees. If you feel loved up when just hanging with your loved ones, quality time might be your number one. 


#5) WORDS OF AFFIRMATION
This is my partners love language - he loves it when I thank him for all the wonderful things he does for me, or when I tell him how well he's doing. He loves people who have nice soft gentle voices and a calming energy. It's one of my lowest scoring love languages so it doesn't come so naturally to me. It can also be super painful for him to hear negative things (whereas being hug starved is much worse for me)! Knowing this about him goes a long way in making sure I communicate verbally in a way that he feels loved in our relationship, which goes a long way in maintaining harmonious relating and happiness!

So gorgeous, what do you think about good old Gary and his love languages? I think they're rather spiffing myself!

You know, we've probably got a combination of all of them inside of us, and different ones might come out in different relationships and with different people, but I think they're a great tool for helping to navigate that place that is often the biggest source of both love and frustration in our lives - our relationships!

If you enjoyed this post and want to take a test to discover your love languages you can do that here - yes they've got their own website! (Click 'learn your love language' at the top of the page - it's free to do!)

Then hit reply to this email and let me know what your love languages are and what epiphanies this brings you about your relationships! I'd love to hear all!

Sending you lots of love in whatever way you like to receive it best!

Keeley xxxxx 💋 💜 🌺 🐷 🌞

P.S. I've got a brand new offering brewing in the cauldron which will help you cultivate and maintain beautiful, deep and harmonious relationships with yourself, your lover(s) or your spouse - so keep a watch out for that magic coming your way soon! 💫
 

Pussy Power (In memory of the best fluffy pussy ever) 💜

Hello!

I want to just take this moment to acknowledge you. And thank you, for your time, eyes, presence, and availability to be here reading these words.

Honestly, I love writing to you, for you, with you. It heals my soul. You heal my soul, every time you open an email from me, and smile, or write me back.

You made the decision to stay, and you keep doing so, and I just want you to know, that I love that you’re here.

💗😊

And now I want to talk to you about PUSSYPOWER...

Specifically, about my cat, who telepathically communicated to me that I should start my own business 3 years ago...

A little backstory...

Last weekend I moved to London, on my own, for a period.

I’ve taken on a research position at the UK’s number 1 ranked institution in academic research excellence you see (go me!) 😉, & Bob has gone up to Scotland as his mum has been diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease 😔...

It’s been a strange funk of newness, old fears coming up & lots of self-realisations.

We knew it was time to leave Bristol.

We were feeling stagnant in the place, and sometimes, I like to shake my life up to the max to get some fresh energy pulsing through it.

But it is never without tears and stress and anxiety. Yet, it is in these moments I really get to know myself.

I remember the wonders of my pussy and my soul shines out of her again...

Now, you may remember that back in May, my cat died.

His name was Frankie AKA Mr Fluff AKA The Fluffy Shaman AKA The KING.

We had been together for 2 years.

After I’d been in Bristol for about 4 months I had this deep calling to get a Fluffy friend. I wasn’t allowed to have pets in my flat so I decided that I would adopt an FIV positive (Feline HIV) cat (i.e. a house-bound cat).

Bob was totally against the whole cat idea.

But when a woman wants something, it’s gonna happen...

So I told him to brace himself, and...

The Sunday after we went to meet Him. Within 10 seconds of meeting him, Bob announced that he was coming home with us.

There was just something right about the whole situation, about him. Something magical and fluffy and... oh so calming!

Frankie had spent the past 2 years locked in a crazy cat woman’s kitchen who stole cat’s off the street and kept them locked up in her house.

The cat charity we got Frankie from were working with her to rehome many of the cats.

He had FIV, half a tail, was obese and a senior with no teeth!

But he was the sexiest damn cat I had ever met...

He just seemed to hover about the house in meditation, levitating from one room to another, bringing a monk like grace wherever he was. He scratched the door down until he got in the bedroom where he planted himself directly on my chest and proceeded to purr the deep kind of purrs that reverberate into your deep tissue cells with healing vibrations that heal your darkest wounds.

His two perfect white paws sat on my solar plexus and if I fell asleep before he, he would stretch out one of his perfect white paws and stick a single claw in my chin until I opened my eyes and resumed his head rub.

He never stood on my breasts (which my other cats do all the time) - he had so much respect for me as a woman!

He followed me everywhere and shared my morning porridge, he meowed for me at the door until I got home and let me take him outside wearing a cat harness and lead!

He was my best friend.

When he got really ill with mouth cancer (which I found out the morning of my photoshoot in LA after being up all night with the worst food poisoning of my life), I had so much regret and grief and sadness and shame that it was my fault.

I worried that I had neglected him when I started my business and our family grew.

For a period, it had been just me and him all the time while I worked for the University from home, and now the house was full of animals and I had to make my own money from scratch.

I remember he kept having difficulty peeing and I got annoyed at him.

I just wanted him to be well - I was stressed and busy and financially pressed.

I thought it was something he had had before that would pass.

Oh Lordy I cried so much about that.

I’m actually crying right now remembering that.

Leaving Bristol bought up a lot of the sadness and grief again surrounding his death.

I feel guilty leaving his little body buried there.

My pussy told me to get him cremated so I could bring him with me, but I didn’t listen to her. I thought it was 'too expensive’ at the time.

Trying to trust in the universe & the events that happened - sometimes it’s hard, sometimes I just want to tell it to go fuck itself.

I even considered digging him up last week, but Bob didn't think it would be a good idea... and deep down, I don’t think I really wanted to either!

'Let him rest in peace', he said.

'But what about me?' I wanted to know.

I guess this is life and it ain’t always roses. I’m just a human learning from my mistakes and hoping to make better decisions next time.

Trying to trust I made the right decisions at the time and forgive myself for not being perfect.

It’s funny how we strongly we focus on what we could have done better, rather than everything we did good and well - which, in my case with Frankie, was probably about 99% of the time.

I can’t imagine what it’s gonna be like having kids - big respect to all yo Mama’s out there...

Anyway, so back to the fun stuff, if you’re still with me - woohoo! I’ll make it worth your while...

After chilling with Mr Fluff on my solar plexus for about 5 months, I decided I wanted to build a website and start some sort of creative business venture.

So I wrote to Company’s House to set myself up with a Limited Company and made an appointment at Barclays Bank to set up a business bank account.

Shane was my account manager, and he thought I was hilarious.

My company was called 'The Fluffy Shaman’, after Mr Fluff of course (AKA The KING, AKA Frankie).

I’m pretty sure it was his business idea that he telepathically communicated to me and made me build with his Fluffy Powers.

That sentence is said kind of partly tongue in cheek, and kind of partly also true.

I don’t think I ever showed anyone TFS website before, expect Bob, which we (me & Mr Fluff) spent hours a day looking at cos we thought it was a fucking artistic masterpiece!

So here you go:

An ode to Mr Fluff & our Fluffy times together.

(If you are not a cat lover then 1) WTF are you doing here? (only joking! 😻), and 2) this may seem like a rather strange odd crazy cat lady email to you, and it is, but seriously, we definitely created that website together & he was undoubtedly a soul partner of mine who levitated and could transport himself through walls - one minute he’s on the bed sleeping, and next his furry tongue is in your cereal bowl on the table yet zero seconds have passed and you never saw him move - explain that one sane human?!)

Anyway, this is an email in memory of Mr Fluff and how much Fluffy Power he had and how much I loved him and how much he healed my life and my solar plexus and bought me so much joy and taught me so much about persistence and not giving a fuck and getting what you want and enjoying a good head rub every single day (several times an hour in fact).

Mr Fluff I love you and I still feel you getting your med on and your calming wise presence around me and on my solar plexus.

I miss your perfect white paws and your cute funny head.

Urban Feministas exists thanks to you and your Fluffy Powers, even though, The King, has, physically, left the building.

So my friend, if you haven’t got a cat, go get one this weekend. And if you do, love his or her purrs extra lots and give them lots of kisses and remember how magical they are.

Really, they have a lot in common with your pussy! 😉

Here’s to the healing powers of FLUFFY PUSSIES!

I love you Fluffty Fluff Fluff.

Your human Mama,

Keeley xxxxx 💋 🌝 🌱

 

P.S. I'd love to hear your magical cat stories (dead or alive!) & see their funny/ cute photos so please do share in the comments below or send me an email!

P.P.S. Fallen in love with Mr Fluff? Of course you have! Find out what happened to him in The Fluffy Adventures...

New Moon in Capricorn (+happybirthdaytome!)

HAPPY NEW MOON LOVE LUMPS!

Booya! Is it my favourite New Moon of the year?

It could be. It's up there with them!

It's definitely usually kind to me.

It's very almost on my birthday this year (that was yesterday), and what can I say? I love me a bit of SeaGoat mymbology (that's symbology + mythology rolled into one neat summary word - good I know).

So what does this New Moon mean for you?

Well let's first take a look at what Capricorn is about, as SHE, is potentially the most misunderstood sign of the zodiac (says the Capricorn)...

This Moon is earthy, cardinal, mystical, focused, clear, prepared & feminine.

Full of new beginnings and potential and possibility.

Not just for the next lunar cycle but for the whole year...

It's a potent energetic time these few weeks (solstice-christmas-newmoon-newyear-perhapsabirthday), where a lot is stirring & shifting in the unconscious, preparing for what is to become manifest as we transition into this new solar & lunar cycle. 
Capricorn is about the connection between the deep waters of our inner world (our unconscious), & our souls outward expression in the material world (our consciousness).

The fish tail of Capricorn keeps us rooted in our soul life, a rich inner world of processing, inner knowing, intuition & spiritual guidance. 

Her goat body allow us to climb the highest mountains, with the most perseverance & sure-footedness of any animal in our Kingdom. 

Capricorn is self-assured, nifty, steadfast & strong willed.

Sometimes aloof, definitely ambitious. Perhaps a little serious...

A visionary leader.

One who is patient, solid & stable.

So this New Moon draw on your inner Capricorn & allow her to vision your soul's highest expression in 2017.

Trust that her wisdom is rooted in a rich emotional life, supported by the ability, skill & perseverance to bring your goals to fruition. 

Intelligent, capable, independent & sturdy. There are no grounds that she cannot adapt to & thrive in.

Evolutionary theory says that around 400 million years ago Tetrapods (4 footed animals with vertebrae's) started to evolve from sea creatures (fish), which had taken around 2.5 billion years to evolve from the first single-celled organisms (amoeba).

Holy shizzle! That's some mind-bogglingly brilliant science right there!

But why are we talking about that Keeley you ask?

Here's why: because Capricorn New Moon is about your evolution. Your evolution from a tiny little zygote cell - formed the moment your papa's sperm + your mama's egg fused together - into the full vibrant creative expressive genius you are/ were born to be.

29 years ago, I, Keeley Tomkinson of Stoke-on-Trent, was the size of a POPPYSEED!!!!!!!!!

And now I am the size of a fully grown human being. I am approximately 37.2 trillion times bigger than I was 29 years ago.

And my soul is only just getting started. 

WTAF! 

So...

Here is my message for you: this week allow the New Moon in Capricorn & The New Year (also in Capricorn - always in Capricorn) to inspire you to fully become all that you are. Set forth on the continued journey to climb the mountain of your life with renewed gusto & oomph. 

This is your life! Right now. Happening, right now!

You have already come so far!

Take stock of that, fill your backpack with vigor & faith & a fresh pair of socks & leap forward into your adventure that is this life. 

You have been waiting 2.5 billion years...

Fuckertyflabberghastingfrollicks!

That is one serious interim!  

So what are you waiting for?!?!

Dump your fear and doubt and insecurity at the door (i.e. with this Moon) and get gone already!

Ask yourself: who would I be if I wasn't afraid anymore? what would I do if I knew that I couldn't fail?

Draw on the wisdom of your 2.5 billion years of ancestors. Think how much longer you'd still be waiting if they were too scared of failing to even begin?!

The time is now!

Wishing you the most wonderful New Moon week with lots of celebrations & magical encounters!

See you at the top of the mountain!

Lots of love,

Keeley ♑ 🐐 🐟 🏔🌛 xxxxxxxxxxxx 💕


P.S. IAMGODDESS opens tomorrow!! Eeek! So keep a hot eye on your inbox for those deets! ;) xx

Am I Normal 'Down There'? (& Merry Christmas)

I think about you all the time. In all of my endeavors.

Not in a creepy way. Just in a, 'I love you' kind of way.

All the fabulous things I learn & encounter as I dance through this life I want to share with you.

It is the life blood of what Urban Feministas is about. A new kind of feminism. A new kind of woman-love.

I know it's the Christmas season, which for many people means stress, travel, family drama, money, partying, letting it all go...

For me, it used to be about those things, but now it is a time of real reflection and new beginnings, and since it's also my birthday season, I get a triple whammy of it.

I was just thinking yesterday (winter solstice) about how painless the transition into darkness has been for me this year.

I remember on the summer solstice being a little apprehensive about the shortening days and closing nights.

Dog walks that used to be at 8pm now at 3pm.

As Limp Bizkit once said, 'keep rollin rollin rollin rollin huh'.

And before you know it, poof! You've come full pendulum swing and it's time to propel forwards into the lightness again.

Today I am here to share 3 things with you:

>> The first is that IAMGODDESS will be announced next week for the New Moon in Capricorn (& meine birthday celebrations - sometimes I slip into the use of German pronouns, it's a hangover from school days, so forgive me for that...)

>> The second is to wish you a fantabulous Christmas holiday & celebration. I used to think that Jesus had ruined my birthday and resent him all his celebrations, but now I take the time to blast out Mariah Carey and enjoy the bustle & festive lights.

>> The third is to share with you my favourite image (see further down the page) I have seen this week! I am still reading Mama Gena's revolutionary book "Pussy! A Reclamation" and have decided that 2017 is really about that for me. Reclaiming Pussy. In all of her delight and wisdom and intense oppression.

At first I cringed at that word, flinched a little, felt uncomfortable and embarrassed and queasy. Bleurgh!

But now I want to say to everyone I meet and sneak it into every sentence I say!

PUSSY PUSSY PUSSY PUSSY PUSSY PUSSY PUSSY PUSSY PUSSY PUSSY PUSSY PUSSY!

I want to shout it from the rooftops. It is so liberating.

I mean, what is insanity if it is not a culture that does not actually have a scientifically correct word from the place from whence we all came?

Think of all the funky words she was given as a little girl?!

Yoni has become a popular acceptable one amongst 'enlightened' crowds, but I'm English, not Hindu, and so I want to reclaim my own Pussy's heritage.

 

 

Because Pussy grabs back, Donald! (#pussypower)

 

Anyway, more on that specifically next year, for now, dear one, I want you to know that your Pussy is normal. And beautiful. And to prove so, here is the most liberating diagram I have ever seen of the collective Pussy.

(Because you know that most women now learn about their Pussies from porn which is edited to change the lip size and colours to be like the Pussy's equivalent of a standard white girl size 0 'super model' right?)

So here it is (Merry Christmas people!):

From the book 'The Sexual Practices of Quodoushka' by Amara Charles.

From the book 'The Sexual Practices of Quodoushka' by Amara Charles.

How awesome is that?!?!?!?

And if you're really into it, you can check what your Pussy's spirit animal(s) means on this Totem website here.

Let me know which you are by hitting reply to this email or posting a comment on the blog (be BRAVE and reclaim your labia! #labialove)

Lot's of love to you Goddess!

Wishing you the best presents ever and lots of fun and cosy time,

Until next week, stay sparkly!

Keeley xxx 🌚🌞✨💖🦄⛄🎄🎅🏾👸🏻💃🏼🎁🎁🎁

 

P.S. IAMGODDESS is coming next week - yayayayay - so make sure you save some festive cheer & celebration for then! 

Everyday Sexism

Hey gorgeous love chop!

Happy Summer Solstice & Full Moon! 🌞 🌕

It's the perfect day to re-energise & rejuvenate yourself with your Solo Retreat (a 30-minute activation meditation guiding you in harnessing the powers of this potent portal of SOLAR & LUNAR energy that is available only for today!) - click here to find out more:

Today I have a little story for you about how this activation meditation came to me. It begins 23 years ago...

23 years ago

This Saturday, me & The Team (see below) took a road trip down to the place that I was born and lived for the first few years of my life. I haven't been back there since I left about 23 years ago.

It is a town called Plymouth on the south coast of England, my Dad was in the royal navy which is why we lived there (it's where the base is).

My mum was only 19 when she had me, my dad 23, and when I reflect on how I was behaving at those ages, I'm pretty astounded at their parenting skills (& full of gratitude & admiration too). 

By the time I was 4, they had separated. My dad left the navy to care for me and we moved back to his hometown and into a council house.

My return visit this weekend was impromptu (I now live about 2 hours from the place & it is a seaside resort), and surprisingly 'unemotional' for me. I always expected it would feel weird going back there, but far from it was the reality.

I was inspired and moved. I visited our old house and facetimed my Dad from the park swing where our family has some infamous photos of me in a pink coat looking uber cute, & him looking like Sting.

Even my Mum got involved, texting me old addresses & landmarks. 

Everyday Sexism

We drove down to the waterfront, found a fish & chip shop & a little secluded alcove by the sea, with the big-beautiful-almost-full-moon beaming directly at us. 🌕

In the chippy, I got out my bank card to pay for our food, at which the guy said, "oh business card [it's my Urban Feministas bank card, I doubt I'm meant to buy fish and chips using it...], does the boss know? haha",

I kind of stood there stunned, and then it registered what had just happened. I very much doubt he would have said that had Bob been buying the fish and chips using a business bank card. 

What a dick. 

The food was pretty shoddy anyway compared to our local, so that made me feel a little better about the whole thing. 

Though I can safely say that our dogs didn't really have an opinion on that!

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IMG_0726.JPG

Moon Ceremony

We (rather I) then felt intuitively called to create a full moon solstice ceremony by the sea under the direct light of the Moon.

I had with me my Goddess oils in my bag and we used a couple of coins which looked like the Moon. I anointed Bob & myself & the coins with the different oils as we asked for direction & guidance & abundance to be brought to us as we move into this second phase of the solar year. 

Goddess Lakshmi - the Hindu Goddess of abundance - she was the main Mamma, shortly followed by Durga for her fierce feminine primordial protection, and Isis & Saraswati for vision, creative direction & destiny. 

Bob sat there with his eyes closed being led through this ceremony and then we threw our coins into the sea for the final ritual, all as our dogs ate seaweed.

It was a pretty sweet day! ❤️  

 

A Good Love Story

 

Everyone loves a good love story right?!

Today a single friend and colleague of mine asked to hear other ladies's love stories for hope and inspiration.

I shared mine, and thought it was such a heart warming topic that I wanted to share it with you too!

And in return, I would love to hear your epic love stories - whether you’re single, in a committed relationship or otherwise.

Any kind of love story goes here. If the greatest love affair of your life has been with yourself, let us know, if it's has been tragic or painful, that’s welcome here too, or if it’s been full of pink fluffy hearts & wild lusty sex, we’ve totally got space for that!

ALL of you is welcome. Real and raw (with a sprinkling of unicorn dust 🦄) is how we like it best.

So without further ado, here is a brief snippet of my epic love story...

"When I was 21 years old, I was working a summer placement at the university after having completed 3 years of my degree, expecting to go on to complete a 4th years Masters degree. I had about £1000 saved for a summer adventure yet my at the time boyfriend and other friends didn't have any money. I was wondering what to do when I found out a friend of a friend was going to Cambodia to live for 6 months. The year previous to this I had lost a dear friend & soul mate of mine due to an accidental drugs overdose. Me and this person had planned to travelsouth east asia together and so I decided to go to Cambodia in his memory. (it had been the worst year of my life since he died, suffering with ptsd, having to attend an inquest with his parents investigating his death - it was traumatic and my soul was still suffering alot). So I booked my return flights to Cambodia on my nan's credit card one lunchtime, dealt with my dad's rebuttal (he was horrified) and found myself having a panic attack in Kuala Lumlpur airport a month or so later. It was a chaotic trip to say the least, fuelled by tequila and klang (cambodian beer). We were staying in the south of Cambodia in Sihanoukville, back in 2009. We got a bus down there and were staying in a place called 'Cool Banana Guesthouse' on Serendipity Strip (near to Serendipity Beach). I didn't know what that word meant at the time, I thought it was just a random street name. Anyway, upon arrival, we were met by a crazy giant Glaswegian bloke wearing a cowboy hat playing Radiohead on a left handed acoustic he had named Laura. He was in charge of the place. And in that moment I met him, I arrived home. I felt safe and happy and entertained and full of love and joy. For the first time in a long time...

The only way I know how to describe that feeling was that it was the first time in my life it had ever felt completely ok to be me. I had a boyfriend back home of course which didn't survive the trip. Our lives in Cambodia were chaotic (he was a type 1 diabetic drinking white Russians for breakfast and I had PTSD!), but we became best friends in that moment. I went back to the UK after my 4 weeks there as arranged, that was on 1st September, and by the 1st October I had decided to exit the university with a BSc (first class thank you very much), I could return to university the following year to complete my masters if i wanted, I had sublet my apartment to a friend, explained to my boyfriend I was going away and found myself back on Serendipity strip with that crazy Scotsman on a Cambodian adventure 1 month later. Our relationship had taken many evolutions over the past 7 and a half years and it took me a long time and a lot of soul searching to fully allow his love in, but he is my soulmate, my committed life partner, my best friend, my place of home. I have never felt a love like his. True adoration and devotion. And while our relationship is far from perfect, when all else fades away and dissolves, there is an unfathomable, indescribable, unspeakable bond that transcends all human understanding, something ancient and cosmic and wonderous that ties us together. He is my home."

The container of his love and has allowed me to grow and know myself in ways I never knew I could.

I will be speaking more about the power of love in future blogs and video’s, but for now, I want to hear your epic love story, or any crazy adventure you have taken in the name of love.

It is, after all, all we need!

Leave a comment on the blog below to let me know!

With copious amounts of Christmas love and sparkles coming your way,

Keeley xxx 💚❤️🎄🎅🎁✨


P.S. Wondering about IAMGODDESS? My brand new masterclass series teaching you how to awaken the magnetic love bubbles and plentiful pleasure capacity inside of your body… It’s coming soon! Keep your eyes peeled and your hearts open! 👀💕

Full Moon in Taurus (Supermoon!)

Full Moon in Taurus is my fav! 

Why? Because the Moon is exalted in Taurus, meaning she is royalty there - elevated to the ranks of the sublime.

In the fixed earth sign of Taurus, the nurturing, feminine, loving aspect of the moon can express most easily, most naturally.

Moon in Taurus is like going to a swanky party where you are the belle of the ball, where the crowds are mesmerised by your charm and beauty and where you feel damn good about yourself.

She is sexy, alive, juicy, vibrant, fun & oozing with eroticism & pleasure & beauty.

Taurus Moon is drop dead gorgeous. The curve of a woman's body, the softness of her skin. 

Her elegance defined only by the sparkle in her eyes. Her radiance defined only by the love in her heart. 

The classiest Bull you ever saw.

Taurus is solid. Born of sheer strength & resilience. Sometimes stubborn, but always an almighty power.

She is sure of herself, sure of her soul.

This full moon, stand under the moonlight & allow her to shower you in pink glittered stardust while stating your 3 deepest desires out loud.

Declare yourself empowered to bring these desires into your life, surrendering anything it's time to let go of. 

Take back the simple sensual pleasures of your body & bask in the richness of what it means to be ALIVE.

SO MUCH LOVE

Keeley 🌕💜💙💚 


P.S. I have a brand new workshop series coming up called IAMGODDESS, where, in a small group together we will be learning practical tools & techniques based in ancient Taoist & Tantric wisdom that awaken a woman's body to her natural pleasure, sensuality and innate radiance & beauty.

If you want to develop unconditional self-love, and the kind of female relationships we have been conditioned to fear & mistrust then this will be the best Christmas gift you can give to yourself!

Stay tuned to find out more! I'll be releasing more info later this week! 
💖

My Greatest Female Role Models

When I was growing up I didn’t have any strong female role models that I aspired to be like. I grew up with my dad and had a strained relationship with my step-mum, and with my mum, so I developed a general mis-trust of women. I preferred men, was a tom boy, and hung out with the lads a lot more.

It’s a key part of the Heroine’s journey that many women born into a patriarchal society take, usually unconsciously - in a society that values the feminine less than the masculine, girls learnt to reject their feminine nature and strive for external markers “success” in the modern world.

Over the past 10 years I have adventured through all the phases of the Heroine’s journey to a place where my inner feminine and masculine are reconciled - in this first spiral anyway. I do believe it is a life long process and it will be generations yet before this separation does not occur in our culture.

Today I want to share with you my top tips that I have learned from my greatest female role models.

But first, let me introduce you to them...

Meet Millie & Fern

Descended from wolves (& teddy bears)...

And here’s what they have taught me about being a woman:

1) There is a greater purpose than myself

I now know what it’s like to love something more than myself. When I was a teenager my dad used to say I wouldn’t understand what it was like to be a parent until I had children of my own. I thought he was wrong and that I already knew everything there was to know in the world. Ha. That teenage arrogance mixed with naivety and a good dose of self-remorse, is funnily something I both miss sometimes, yet no way would I wish to return back there. As I get older I am surprised by my genuine affection of world-politics, something that passed me by as a teenager as I focused on who I was going to snog at the weekend and how I could become one of the thinner prettier girls. I have a sense that the world is much bigger than me now, that the choices I make do matter, that where I put my focus does matter. Those 2 cute beasties ignited a fire in me that reminded me that I actually give a fuck about the world; I would do anything to protect them and there is a powerful warrioress inside of me that will stand strong for what she believes in.

2) Period blood isn’t dirty (& being precious about hygiene is neurotic)

It actually isn’t. Like at all. They lick theirs up and swallow it - totally ungrossed out, totally unphased, totally and completely ok with it. I mean, they do lots of other gross things that I definitely wouldn’t advise, and I’m not saying we should all start drinking our own menstrual blood, but this general objection to bodily fluids seems to be uniquely human - a cultural conditioning, a learned behaviour. It gets in the way of our sex lives & it trains us to fear our primal wild nature. I’m not sure where it comes from - the religious indoctrination of the original sin perhaps mixed with the discovery of bacteria & viral born diseases & the basic hygiene practices that can prevent their spread.
I’m all for good hygiene & cleanliness, but if it’s getting neurotic, perhaps it’s time to figure out what’s really going on beneath the surface.

Quote by Clarissa Pinkola Estes

Quote by Clarissa Pinkola Estes

3) Being ferocious and telling someone you don’t like or see as a threat to fuck off is ok

When I was a teenager I was imbued with the message that I shouldn’t walk the streets late at night, that I was always in danger of being sexually assaulted. It built in me this general fear, like I had to keep myself small to be safe - always looking over my shoulder - wondering who was round the corner or in the dark shadows.

Thankfully for me, no-one was. But this training to keep my femininity small & scared still lingers for me today and is pandemic.

I had a recent awakening into a different aspect of this energy - one full of fierceness and ferocity and an almighty big NO. I learnt it from my dogs - any time another dog comes up to them that they don’t like or feel threatened by, any time a male dog pesters them when they are on heat and they are playing fetch with their balls and aren’t interested, they tell them to get-to-fuck in the most ferocious way, they don’t care how big the other dog is - they say NO. And the other dog always listens. They don’t care if the other dog then dislikes them, they don’t worry whether they were socially or politically correct or not, they aren’t in being polite or sweet or agreeable - they act on their impulse, they don’t second guess themselves and they do what they need to protect themselves.

4) Flirting & initiating sex is as equally female as it is male

When my dogs are in heat, they are game for anything, Fern turns into the sexiest little minx you ever saw. She’s into labradors and she wafts her little booty around sending all the boys crazy. If a dog comes over she doesn’t like - she tells him to fuck-off by snarling her gnashes and chasing him away - if he continues to pester her - she’ll take him down!
Millie is less fussy, she goes searching for them, and she will do practically anything to get some rubs whether she’s on heat or not. This idea that female's only want sex for pro-creation and not pleasure is just plain wrong, and that pleasurable sex is only done by humans and Dolphins is ridiculous. Millie is evidence right there.

In a study that analysed speed dating statistics, it was found that women were much less likely to request an in person date with the men they had met - they were much more selective. This was added as more proof to evolutionary theory - that women long for one mate and men are designed to spread their seed. However, no-one seemed to care that the study design was biased - in all the cases studied, the women were stationary and the men rotated approaching the women. When a new study was done that equally assessed each gender as the approached and the approachee, it was found that men and women were equally interested in having a second date with the partners they had met. When the social structure was removed - women were as keen as the men.

Now I want to hear from you! Who have been your greatest female role models and what have you learnt from them? You can tell me by hitting reply to this email or leave a comment on the blog.

Until next time,

Wishing you much love & adventure,

Keeley xx

 

New Moon in Scorpio

Intensely passionate, Scorpio is the headmistress of death & rebirth. 

Well versed in the socially taboo, she sees through all the facade's, all the bullshit held in place to prop up the system so fragile it could crumble at any minute. 

Scorpio wants to speak about the underbelly of life - the moist, damp dark place where the woodlice & spiders come crawling out from when you move a stone that hasn't been moved for years. She ain't scared of no spider.

She wants to know what you think about in your darkest moments, who you are when you think no-one is watching, she wants to know the taste of your blood and your tears and your sweat...

Raw, powerful, taboo. The crux of transformation. 

She can hold all of you. In fact, she demands that ALL of you show up & pay attention to your life. 

No emotion frightens her; the richer, the deeper, the more potent, the better it is. 

She is water, she is fixed and holy fuck can she sting if you cross her. Do not cross her.

She is a powerful friend to have. Remain on her side.

She can cut you in two with a single look or open your soul to the wildest expansion of intimacy & connection.

She is autumn, she is the approaching darkness, the seductress, the enchantress.

She is pre-menstrual ferociousness and intuition and deep deep wisdom. 

She demands you speak your truth, she insists you only engage in encounters that can fulfill the depth of your psyche.

Scorpio New Moon is deep and meaningful and passionate and intense and full to the brim of wisdom & insight & raw untapped power. 

Go with that, embrace that part of you. Channel your inner witch, your inner magic maker, the part of you that knows, without doubt, the truth of who you are at your core & what you are here to do. 

This New Moon ask yourself: 
"where do I need more passion in my life?"
"am I fulfilled with my intimate & sexual encounters?"
"where can I harness the raw potential of my feminine power to create what I want more of in my life?"

And then when you know what it is that this New Moon is about for you, allow your inner witch to share her wisdom with you & set about making it happen.

The New Moon is a time for manifesting, bringing in & setting intentions for the lunar cycle ahead, & with this New Moon in Scorpio & Samhain celebrations this weekend, the veil between the physical & metaphysical worlds are thinnest, opening a portal of intuitive energy up to us.  

I'd love to hear what your New Moon intentions are so let me know by hitting reply to this email!

Until next time,

New Moon Love,

Keeley

Full Moon in Aries

Full Moons are big, bright, dominant, full of conflict & illuminating of what lurks in the shadows. 

Aries shadow is full on aggressive, arrogant and confrontational.

As we move into the shorter days it is time to surrender the things of summer and embrace the approaching darkness. 

This can bring up feelings of resistance, feelings we are not yet ready to embrace.

Aries is the impulse & drive that creates new life, against all odds. And here he finds himself in the decaying fallen mulch of autumn. Frustrated with the slower pace, desperate to conquer new grounds & announce himself King of the world.

This full moon you may feel like you are being pulled in two different opposing directions - spring & fall.

The words are self-explanatory - your desire to spring forward is jolted by the denser energy of fall...

You may feel a tyrannical need to push, finish, power on through, and when this isn't possible, you can guarantee that stern beration is in tow. 

If you feel a need to cling to all the hopes and dreams of this year that didn't come to full fruition in the solar peak as you might have hoped, know that this will pass soon enough. 

If you feel a need to judge yourself for everywhere you think you are too lazy or don't do enough, know that this will pass soon enough.

If you feel a need to compare yourself with others and wonder why you aren't further ahead yet, know that this will pass soon enough. 

Autumn is the season of letting go, of surrendering, of dying in order to be reborn - yet we fear the death because we do not trust fully in life. 

An Aries full moon is a challenging energy to navigate as the clocks prepare to go backwards, so if you are feeling stuck & out of sync right now, remind yourself that...
 
'You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees or the stars; you have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.'

Let the full moon reign down upon you, & allow her to show you what to let go of in order to fully embrace the waning solar energy of 2016.

With an abundance of Full Moon Love for you 🌕

Keeley xxx